Tuesday, 9 October 2012

Dissolve Me



photos from my A2 photography coursework

So my 18th birthday really wasn't what I hoped it would be.  I was ditched by my friends yesterday and my boyfriend today, spending most of my evening crying so don't really feel too loved.  I got some good presents, some alcohol and money from my grandparents and auntie but otherwise nothing particularly special.  I sound like a typical ungrateful teen but I've honestly felt the shittiest I've felt in a long time in this short time period which is supposed to be the one time a year when I feel the happiest and the one time where I can be the centre of attention for just one day.  I hope my mood picks up soon because I honestly have no motivation for college or any of my so-called friends.  I just feel like all my efforts are knocked down and I end up falling flat on my face no matter how hard I try.  I'm feeling more excluded than ever which is horrible and I just want to escape from everything but instead I have to shut up and deal with it which is getting fucking old now, it's all just getting to me and I want it to stop.
Sorry about the negative post, I gotta have somewhere to vent and unfortunately it's here. Peace out.
love amy x
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39 comments:

  1. Friends can be shit , boys can be even shitter! Don't worry sweet cheeks it'll be okkk! Plus you're gorgeous! That's something to smile about! LOVE <3 xxx

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  2. Oh babe, that really is shitty! Why did your friends ditch you? I'm sure things will get better for you soon :)

    Love your coursework!

    Bemsy x

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  3. Aww that's terrible! Well you know they're not true friends if they ditch you on your 18th birthday which is like one of the most important days of your life! I say find some new friends, they don't deserve you! Love the outfit! x

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  4. What, they ditched you? That's awful, I turned eighteen earlier this year so I don't think you're being ungrateful at all, it was your eighteenth and that's a pretty big deal, I think. If I was you I wouldn't even bother wasting any more time with them. I hope your mood picks up soon for you, too!

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  5. your photos are always great, but these are my favorite!

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  6. You have the right to feel like that sweetie, but now the only thing you should do is smile about the good things you have in your life, like all these followers that love you and everyday hope to see a post from you, and even unicorns, I'm sure they love you too hehe
    You're beautiful :)
    x

    http://be-your-own-hero-now.blogspot.pt/

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  7. it's awful going through stuff like this with school and friendships, especially on your birthday:( I hope life picks up for you soon! happy birthday lovely, even if it hasn't been the best:( and you look gorgeous as always!xxx

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  8. aw amy im so sorry you feel like this, i've been feeling the same way lately, and i know its shitty. I'm so sorry you didn't enjoy your 18th birthday, i hope things get better!
    <3
    x

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  9. Hope things perk up soon, friends can be the shittiest people at times, especially if they're one of the only things keeping you from feeling low. Don't give up on your studies, you'll be so proud of everything you've accomplished at the end of it all, and you'll be moving on to bigger and better things, and meeting new people too x

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  10. I always think it is good to write things down and your blog enables you to do that. I think your friends are jealous of your awesome style and fashion sense. I have no idea what has gone on behind the scenes but remember one friend is worth more than having lots of friends. Can I recommend something? I have two books one is sad and the other happy I write down all my thoughts in them and then I lock them away. Then months maybe years later I will read them and see if the situations have changed. I don't have any friends here in the North East myself, I think it could possibly be my so called posh accent or the fact that I have a degree really intimidates people. I just don't know. The thing is girls are bitchy, but when and if you go to uni my advice would be to live with just boys, that is the best advice I can give. I lived with 3 other girls and it was painful, one of the worst mistakes of my life. If I were you I would let these girls/boys just get on with it and I wouldn't bother with them, let them come back to you and if they don't its their lose.

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  11. Oh no! That sounds really crappy... I hope things look up for you soon! Friends really can let you down sometimes, especially when you REALLY want them to be there. Their loss anyway, you seem a lot of fun and pretty cool to me :)

    XO

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  12. These are some stunning photos you are clearly a very talented photographer!
    Anna

    http://opshopaholic.blogspot.co.nz/

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  13. Why did your friends ditch you? How mean is that? I personally think that friends are supposed to prep an amazing birthday for oneself! At least! Really sorry it went that bad, but happy belated birthday :)

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  14. Cute outfit you remind me of Jenny Humphrey from Gossip Girl! RoRos World

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  15. You look gorgeous! I love the tights. Everyone has crappy weeks/months but it totally sucks that yours is happening on your 18th birthday. I hope things start looking up and there is nothing wrong with using your blog to vent - it's quite refreshing! xx

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  16. Aww that sucks to be feeling crap, when your meant to be having a blast with your friends. Tbh a tad unfair that they are making you feel like this :( *virtual hugs*.
    Hope things start to get better sooner rather than later :)
    pictures are looking awesome btw :D
    x

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  17. dont feel bad for venting, your blog is your little space to say what you want.
    dont feel down. You look gorgeous in your pic xxx

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  18. did they have a good reason to do that? maybe its just bad timing you know. on one's birthday everyone expects that on this particular day everything will be perfect but unfortunately its not the case many a times. but on the other side your outfit looks lovely!

    sun-driven.blogspot.com

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  19. Ah lovely I've been ditched on special occasions in the past too.. it really does suck but it shows you who is worth making the effort with when it comes round to their day! Go have a meal or something this weekend & have a second birthday! ;) xx

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  20. Vent away!
    I always feel like birthdays always involve someone letting you done, it's horrible :(
    I hope you start to feel better soon

    xxx

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  21. Amazing outfit! just fabulous! like the shorts and the love of detail!! i really like your blog. so inspiring!! do you want to follow each other on gfc?? Let me know by posting on my blog :-) would be great! :o)

    www.walkonthestylesite.blogspot.com

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  22. Hi dear…nice blog… ❤
    amazing look ^^
    What do you think to follow each other on bloglovin and GFC too?
    Kiss and have a nice day

    Vendy
    http://simplelifeve.blogspot.it

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  23. i was ditched on my 18th too by all my friends, know excatly how you feel,
    hope your ok:) x

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  24. Can I just have your hair please? :P

    http://rosalindis.blogspot.com.es/

    xx

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  25. I love your style so much and this outfit is gorgeous!:) x


    http://modessionx.blogspot.de/

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  26. aww sorry to read that, but your pretty awesome so keep that head up high and keep blogging :) Happy belated 18th xxx

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  27. really hope your beginning to look up with all these lovely comments from your followers! Friends are not worth having if they cant stick with you on your 18th I think its crazy! but hold your head up high, your GREAT! Absolutely love your blog, your fashion is just what i like! Keep it up :)
    Loves
    + Happy belated birthday!!!!!

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  28. I really hope you're feeling better now! But look,what doesn't kill you makes you stronger :) I'm sure you're strong enough to just forget that day...and betters days will come! If your friends ditched on you they don't deserve you. You're gorgeous and you seem to be an incredible person...so what about meeting new people?! And please smile!! <3 xxx

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  29. that actually sucks and on your birthday! hope your feeling better, when ever i feel shite i just resort to shopping! aha :)

    http://style-delirium.blogspot.co.uk/
    x

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  30. sorry to hear about it hun, hope you feel better now xx
    thebeautyheroes.blogspot.co.uk

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  31. I love your style :)
    you are awesome!

    http://bubblemylicorice.blogspot.com/

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  32. In love with your blog and your style! Following you for sure x

    http://riley-ellise.blogspot.co.uk/

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  33. Hi,
    firstly, I'm sorry to hear about your birthday :( If it's any consolation I think your blog and yourself are beautiful. I know it's hard but you look like an amazingly creative girl so I'm sure if you stay positive only good things can come your way <3

    le fresne x

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  34. Lovely blog!! Would you like to follow each other on gfc and bloglovin?
    STEPHILà CREATIONS-MYFASHIONBLOG

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